Sheep don’t exist.

I owe an apology, I have been caught up in research. After revealing all there is to be cared for about horses… I was given an exclusive hint by a teacher friend revealing an ancient conspiracy of Dan Brown proportions….

First of all, let us remember that famous quote from the ‘Gospel of Matthew’, 7:15…

Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves”

Innocent advice enough, one might think.

Wolves in sheep’s clothing are to be avoided. Personally I avoid wolves full stop. So it’s quite logical that meeting a clothed wolf in a dark alley is about on a par in terms of scary as meeting a naked man in the woods.

The flaw here is, there is no record of sheep existing before the Bible. They don’t actually exist. Not naturally anyway. Ask yourself, what is wrong with this picture?

Yes, now it is clear. They are all wearing the same 'clothing'. Or, could it be a 'uniform'? I'll leave you to decide....

Obviously, if sheep had occured naturally, like us humans, then there would be more variation in a herd. Some might have beards, some might be wearing slippers, and a small proportion would have left the field early to get home to watch X factor.

The quote actually is a coded message to all agents of Christianity, to amass a wolf army and disguise them as harmless lumps of wool. The most compelling evidence lies in the “Meal times with Jesus” series of paintings by Leonardo da Vinci.

You may have to click on these to zoom in and see the tiny details that help enlighten us to the truth.

The First Breakfast, by Leonardo Da Vinci. Notice the wolf army amassed in the garden behind them.

The Last Supper, by Leonardo Da Vinci. Click the picture and note how white and fluffy the wolves now look.

Quite what the motives behind organising a worldwide wolf army might be I am not sure. I can’t help but think this┬árevelation┬áraises more questions than it provides answers.


– Where do sheep dogs fit into this?
– Could it be a plot to hide wolves for their own safety? After the Red Riding Hood backlash?
– Will this lead to a spin off movie? Perhaps ‘The boy who cried sheep”.
– Whatever happened to the fish and the sniper?

You may try to answer them, but for now I’m going back to my winter hibernation..

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One Response to “Sheep don’t exist.”

  • beatnik307 Says:

    Came from reddit, like the blog. I especially agree with your profile in that, within us all, there’s a little Mark and Jez, but it’s just the proportions that need to be worried about.

    Anyway, back to the topic at hand.

    Hold on there, buddy, saying that sheep didn’t exist before the Bible. I’ll have you know that wikipedia says differently. Not a big detail, but consider this alternate conspiracy theory: those that lived in Biblical and Pre-Biblical times must have been RAVAGED by these types of wolf attacks–attacks which rely on the element of surprise, which, without convenient means of mass communication, the wolves would almost always possess. This passage was specifically written into this widely disseminated document for the sole purpose of warning of surprise wolf attacks, thereby diminishing their deadliness.

    And that, is why we are no longer attacked by wolves.

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